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thanateQuestion for the day: What would you serve at your lynching?
(for reasons that are unlikely to become clear again, there was discussion of how to make a lynching into a proper martha-stuart-approved tradition as welcomed into the home. Apparently this involves food.)
The group favorites (as agreed upon by Jillian and me, anyway) were small pigs-in-blankets (how is one supposed to pluralize that?) and baby quiche, as the optimal trade-off between elegance and down-home microwave cooking. For the southern enthusiast, we offer catfish sushi and crawdad tempora. Steve, we decided, would have something involving arugula, or possibly baba ghanouj. (at which point we got side-tracked by the question of whether you design the food to suit the lynch-ers or the lynch-ee... but not knowing any lynchers, we went with letting people design their own.)
Shary: Where is this lynching being held?
me: South Carolina.
Shary: Oh, excellent. I'd start by serving mint juleps on the veranda.
me: Whose veranda? Before you set out, you mean?
Shary: The veranda of the lynch-ee. That way you can get a head start on the wake and funeral, all at one go.
Kristen: Oh, I think finger sandwiches.
Jillian: Nice.
Kristen: Thin little cucumber sandwiches...
Heather: at my lynching?
me: yes.
Heather: Arsenic.
We decided perhaps she had the right idea. Possibly we should go for something to make the lynch-ers so blind drunk they can't go on with it. Or a nice sedative.
Brian: Butternut squash. Is that good? Goulash!
me: ...but if you're a northerner, does that mean you have to be tarred and feathered first?
Brian: in that case, chicken.
me: and then you use the feathers from the chicken for the feathering part.
Jillian: very economical.
(for reasons that are unlikely to become clear again, there was discussion of how to make a lynching into a proper martha-stuart-approved tradition as welcomed into the home. Apparently this involves food.)
The group favorites (as agreed upon by Jillian and me, anyway) were small pigs-in-blankets (how is one supposed to pluralize that?) and baby quiche, as the optimal trade-off between elegance and down-home microwave cooking. For the southern enthusiast, we offer catfish sushi and crawdad tempora. Steve, we decided, would have something involving arugula, or possibly baba ghanouj. (at which point we got side-tracked by the question of whether you design the food to suit the lynch-ers or the lynch-ee... but not knowing any lynchers, we went with letting people design their own.)
Shary: Where is this lynching being held?
me: South Carolina.
Shary: Oh, excellent. I'd start by serving mint juleps on the veranda.
me: Whose veranda? Before you set out, you mean?
Shary: The veranda of the lynch-ee. That way you can get a head start on the wake and funeral, all at one go.
Kristen: Oh, I think finger sandwiches.
Jillian: Nice.
Kristen: Thin little cucumber sandwiches...
Heather: at my lynching?
me: yes.
Heather: Arsenic.
We decided perhaps she had the right idea. Possibly we should go for something to make the lynch-ers so blind drunk they can't go on with it. Or a nice sedative.
Brian: Butternut squash. Is that good? Goulash!
me: ...but if you're a northerner, does that mean you have to be tarred and feathered first?
Brian: in that case, chicken.
me: and then you use the feathers from the chicken for the feathering part.
Jillian: very economical.