The post-holiday quandaries are as follows:

[thanate]

1) Where to put all the little airplanes my grandparents brought us, because when I said we'd like to adopt one model airplane to put up on our blue-sky bedroom ceiling, they brought them all and a box to put them in.

2) What two people who have far too much stuff already ought to be putting on their wedding "registry" (non-branded) for those people who are not inclined to donate to charity instead, nor sufficiently inspired to make/buy handmade happy-ever-aftery things. (whatever those are, of course...) So far, we have a meager ten things or so, and they include smoke detectors and a fire safe. And while, admittedly, it is nice not to be burned alive, I can think of few things I consider less romantic.

3) Whether I will be unknowingly traumatizing small children elsewhere in the world by the occasional gruesome creature description on the Spore creatures which I am building to send off into the void. (I'm thanate there, too, if you play and want to take a look at my doodles... the names and descriptions are usually the best part.)

4) And the ongoing, existential: Having survived another year, have I justified my existence yet? How would I know if I had, anyway?

Comments

Re: 4 woo existential :)

[thanate.livejournal.com]

probably to my conscience? ("was your output in benefit-to-others worth your drain in use of their time/space/resources?" (am I being a parasite) plus "have you done anything today that you'll be glad to have done later on?" (am I wasting the time I have & going to regret that later))

Because it's another thing to feel bad/inadequate about? There was something on NPR a couple weeks back that we didn't listen to, but heard the trailer in which they were saying that most americans live with chronic feelings of dissatisfaction (that wasn't quite the right phrase, but pretty close) which one of my co-workers and I agreed pretty much described our employment history, if nothing else.

Re: 4 woo existential :)

[fishy1.livejournal.com]

I recently made a resolution to the effect of not letting other people's scales of what is 'good enough' affect my self-judgment as much. this, of course leaves me with having to make up my own scales in order to know if i'm doing OK.

Too much 'worth math' is bad for the soul.

I believe that i should not have to 'work' for a living, but should be able to get by just doing things i enjoy. Sometimes i think this makes me a bad person.

Re: 4 woo existential :)

[thanate.livejournal.com]

I'm not too concerned with other people's scales-- that's often one of my strong points, I guess. But creating reasonable scales for myself is tricky; it's kind of the problem of comparing yourself to the ideal that you can't ever reach, and thus not having any concept of what progress you might have made.

I think if the things you enjoy have sufficient social-barter value to keep you from being parasitic (in a basic sense: you provide sufficient happiness to outweigh others having to work/interface with the capitalist system on your behalf) then no, there's no reason to think you're a bad person. If what you enjoy is taking mind-destroying drugs and burning people's houses down, then perhaps not so much.